Females Are Incapable of Making Themselves Happy


This morning, while snuggling up to my sweetie, a bunch of different thoughts that I collected from around the manosphere lately congealed into the realization stated in the title of this post: Females are incapable of making themselves happy.

I discovered the Manosphere well over a year ago and took the red pill. The red pill is not pleasant; it is large and kind of chalky and sticks in your throat as you are taking it. You choke, you gag on it, you want to perform the Heimlich on yourself to spit it out, but finally you get that mofo down.

My getting the red pill past my esophagus was the realization that I was not the most important person in my life; my husband is the most important person in my life.

Before the red pill, back when I was the most important person in my life, I was bored. I was unhaaaappy. Since I put myself first, and I was in charge of my own life, it was up to me to make myself happy. No amount of new shoes, cute haircuts, promotions at work or anything else I tried made me happy. I was incapable of making myself happy.

Once I put my husband first, and started thinking of how to make him happy, I became happy. I mean, that sounds sappy and maybe a little trite or whatever; it sounds like advice someone really old would tell you & you would pat them on the head & smile at how out of touch the old dear is, but it is true. The best way of making myself happy is concentrating on making my husband happy.

Judgy Bitch has an excellent post on woman’s capacity to love others more than themselves & this was a part of my realization this morning. The other part of the realization was a post The Private Man had on how men should let a woman be nurturing. (He promised another post on nurturing, hint, hint.)

When I realized that my husband was the most important person in my world, I made it a specific goal to look as hot as I possibly can – in the way that HE wants, cook his favorite foods, & make him feel special and loved. I changed from “never say no” to “always be very enthusiastic” regarding sex & cuddling and everything about him.

The reason feminists and women in general can never be happy is because they are the most important people in their own worlds. They spend their lives in the pursuit of their own happiness. They will never find that happiness in themselves. It doesn’t exist.

They will only find happiness in losing themselves in love. This love could be the love of a child or the love of a good man (yes a NICE man). Losing that insatiable desire to make yourself happy or being upset that SOMEONE ELSE isn’t making YOU happy & turning it into the desire to make someone else happy is the key.

When women try to make themselves happy, it always turns into something stunted: riding the cock carousel (the NEXT asshole alpha will make me happy), getting addicted to plastic surgery (if I were prettier I would be happy), climbing the corporate ladder (if I made six figures I would finally be happy), etc. It doesn’t ever work & that’s why feminists are perpetually unhappy.

The thing is that I don’t think this is true of men. Men are perfectly capable of making themselves happy & are less happy when trying to make women happy. (Holy crap I’m writing the word “happy” a lot!)

I also think that when the male writers of the Manosphere say “What do you bring to the table” they mean “How are you going to do your best to make me happy”.

I hope all this makes sense & I didn’t ramble too much. This is just a thought I came up with this morning & it hasn’t completely congealed yet. I really just wanted to get my thoughts down and out there because I think I might have figured out something of earth-shattering importance. (Or not, whateves 🙂 )

[Note: while looking for a graphic for this post, I searched images for “happiness” & every other image said something about how “happiness depends on ourselves” & “the only person who can make you happy is YOU”, which may be true for men but is not true for women.]


21 thoughts on “Females Are Incapable of Making Themselves Happy

  1. LostSailor

    Nice blog. And welcome to the manosphere; we can always use like-minded female allies. Yes, the Red Pill is hard to swallow. I’ve described the process–at least for men–as going through a process similar to the Kubler-Ross stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, etc. But once the scales fall from your eyes, there is no going back…

  2. Francis Begbie

    There’s a reason like men like myself have been able to exploit the female imperative to my advantage, Ie.,cheating on ALL of these beta males with these women. Women need to be dominated, but obviously, not in a control freak sort of way. sorry like, i banged a lassie up her arsehole , and she loved it, and i enjoy your blog, because you seem like an intelligent person. I wish you the best and a good relationship with that. Sincerely. I want a real, decent woman. Not a random slut, Good luck to you in the meanwhile.Btw, I’m quite drunk right now so…apologizes,

  3. TempestTcup Post author

    It’s a tough pill to swallow, that’s for sure. When I first stumbled onto the manosphere I was absolutely horrified to recognize my behavior in the comments and posts of others. I did whatever I could to not only change my behavior but to go beyond that & make up for being so bitchy! It was tough at first, but now it’s a pretty fun ride 🙂

  4. Red Pill Woman

    This is true. I agree completely. And it’s only been a recent thing that women have to do x and x (usually involving a career or something else meaningless) to make themselves happy. It’s no surprise that depression is at an all-time high for women. I do think that the happiness of their women has an impact of men, but I’m not a man so I don’t really know. Well-written post!

  5. TempestTcup Post author

    Thank you so much! I think that men really like being catered to & pampered & it makes them closer to their spouse, but when men cater to their spouse, the female loses interest in them. The brain is an incredibly weird thing!

    As one of the first generations completely indoctrinated in feminism from birth (the Baby Boomers that preceded me were born in tradition & introduced to feminism in their teens & twenties) the whole idea of living my life to please my husband goes against everything I’ve ever been (wrongfully) taught. I wasted so many years!

  6. Red Pill Woman

    It’s true, and I think we’ve all experienced it. Acknowledging it is hard!
    Yep, it took a long time to even accept the idea that possibly living to please your husband could be the answer to happiness for ~some women~, let alone most women! It’s okay, at least you know what you’re doing now! My sister is only 7 years younger than me and I can see how there is even more pressure from feminism in her age group than there was when I was that age. It’s very prevalent, and I fear it’ll get worse.

  7. TempestTcup Post author

    I’m afraid that you are probably correct. Feminists are so incredibly vocal & sexing up a bunch of cute guys & being a Strong Independent Woman sounds a lot more exciting than cooking dinner!

  8. Hamster Tamer

    So refreshing to say “No, really, I’m attracted to your MIND”… without a hint of sarcasm! 🙂

  9. Pingback: La Inevitabilidad De La Sumisión Femenina | Bar de la Esquina

  10. Taylor Tune Tracy (@taylortunetracy)

    I’m new to The Red Pill, just found it on Reddit and saw your post linked in a comment. Out of curiosity:

    >Men are perfectly capable of making themselves happy & are less happy when trying to make women happy.

    I’m a little bit confused. Based on your post, men aren’t happy making women happy and are able to make themselves happy. Why have women around at all? And if they aren’t trying to make women happy but women are trying to find happiness in making their male counterpart happy, isn’t that a bit one sided? How does the woman start feeling the reward and if you’re in a relationship where you’re still only dating and not married, how are you able to tell if you’re just being used? I tried my best to make my man happy and I recently overheard him saying I was a total doormat and he was living the dream. That did NOT make me feel happy! I asked him if he was happy and if there was anything I could do to make things better, he said no. I doubt he’ll ever tell me to my face what he said…but I’m not getting much out of this relationship. He is happy but doesn’t care about me, I am stuck with bills, chores, etc and he is being waited on hand and foot. When does it switch over? What can I do to make him care? How, based on The Red Pill and what you’ve said in this post, would I be able to tell if he cares about me or only cares about being pampered? I haven’t felt love in this relationship in a while but I want to make it work.

    Any insight on TRP and what I’m doing wrong would be great!!

  11. TempestTcup Post author

    He doesn’t sound like a very good man to be attached to. It isn’t supposed to be one-sided, when you step up your game, it usually spurs the man into upping his game. If your man is reaping the rewards without working harder himself, then you might have to throw this one out.
    “but I’m not getting much out of this relationship. He is happy but doesn’t care about me” – this is not a sign of a man who is ever going to be the man you will want him to be. Come visit us at the RedPillWomen subreddit; it’s a bunch of really great women figuring out this very same thing.

  12. Bobbie Gauche

    Men and women, not just women, get happy by lovING, more than being lovED, and wanting love, trying to get love, is the unhappiest state. We try to get love when we think we haven’t got it. We think we haven’t got it because we are damn angry, or fearful or some othe negative emotion that we are refusing to admit, and trying to love over the top of. So admit it, feel it, and decide to love. It’s a decision. LovING can include loving what we do and loving ourselves, but begins with admitting it to ourselves when we don’t. Falsely suppressing our antilove feelings and trying to be nice and loving over the top creates a feeling of separation, and emptiness and lack and neediness for love. By Bobbi Pagani – on fb.

  13. ReallyRealYo

    This comment was for the girl who said ‘how can I make him care?’… You CAN’T! He has to want to care for you or he never will. A good dominant would show you appreciation and attention for submissive acts. If he’s just ignoring you while expecting you to clean and serve him all day, then he’s just using you for work… My suggestion would be to try to discuss your need for more attention/gratitude/whatever in a calm and nonaccusatory tone with him. If he yells/ignores you still, then it’s probably time to drop the asshole and get an actual dominant…

  14. Bongo man

    “Once I put my husband first, and started thinking of how to make him happy, I became happy” … because you finally started using your given female tools optimally. Communication, the healing arts, being the family ‘glue’, etc. The same way as your husband becomes happy when he tries to make you happy…. by using the male tools given to him at birth… logical thinking, a body meant to do hard physical tasks, etc. It’s like puzzle pieces fitting together.

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