This is from a comment I left on Ian Ironwood’s excellent post: Breaking Beta: The Boob Test, about how I upped my husband’s Alpha by reverse-engineering. I’ve been leaving comments like this all over the manosphere, but I never thought to actually post this here. I know this sounds manipulative, but it only involves three little, but very important steps:
Don’t be a Bitch; Always be Enthusiastic; & Let Him Run the Show.
I started on a program to Reverse-Alpha my husband (reverse me being a complete ball-buster) last year about this time & it’s going swimmingly! What I did was quit doing all of the things that made him back down into Bad-Beta (the cringing Beta, not the flowers & sweet words Good-Beta). By me not nagging & shit-testing him, he improved dramatically! I think this is what the seven-year-itch is about – it takes the wife that long to know exactly how to suck the soul right out of domesticate the husband.
Then, I quit initiating sex (I was the main initiator & sometimes felt like I was forcing myself on him) while always ‘accidentally’ being ready & available for it. Oopsies, look I just happen to be clean, nude & cuddled next to you when you wake up! I told him about 6 months later that my body was his to touch whenever & however he wanted: not just ‘never say no’, but ‘always be very enthusiastic’. That’s when he discovered his new-found passion of swatting my ass, lol.
I had been running the marriage (yeah, I know, I know), but I stepped back & quit making the big decisions. I pretty much quit making all decisions except my personal work ones & little ones, like what I’m cooking for dinner. I started leaving pertinent Red Pill blog posts on the screen when he got online to check his stocks & the news. He started bookmarking some of them & then he would sometimes implement some of the ideas therein. I have the most amazing marriage now.
Tl;dr: Men are much more Alpha when they are not miserable!